The Need to “Get Inside Their Head”
So often, when we hear someone talk about “getting inside someone’s head” it’s meant as a way to manipulate and control. Athletes use this phrase a lot. They know that if they can get inside their opponent’s head — have them bothered, confused, intimidated, etc. — they can “throw them off their game” and make them far less effective.
I love watching “Patrick Jane” on The Mentalist get inside his suspects’ heads in order to get them to involuntarily give themselves away. Come to think of it, “Lieutenant Columbo”, via his, “Oh, just one more thing” used to do the same to his suspects.
But, in the awesome book, Taking People With You: The Only Way to Make Big Things Happen, YUM! Brands Chairman & CEO, David Novak approaches this totally differently and benevolently. He believes that only by getting into the heads of those you want to take with you can you understand their needs and desires.
And, when thinking about it, not only is it true; it is perhaps the only way one can effectively lead and influence others.
When he says “get inside their head” he means determining what it is they desire, and how doing what you’re asking them to do fits into — and aligns with — their values. This goes right back to Dale Carnegie’s admonition that “people do things for their reasons, not our reasons.”
If you want to influence and lead, and bring out the best in the individuals on your team (or anyone else you must influence in the process of accomplishing your goal or mission), you’ll need to focus on how it affects them.
One important point Mr. Novak brought up is also being interested enough to learn what fears they might have that could possibly keep them from buying into your ideas.
So, yes…when done with a true sense of caring about the other person, getting inside a person’s head can be one of the most benevolent and effective methods of bringing people along with you and helping them realize their great potential.
How do you do in this regard? Who are the great influencers in your life who seems to have this knack for understanding what drives others and even what holds them back? Can you duplicate their thought process?
If you’d like to listen to my chat with David in which he shared numerous, hard-hitting and valuable ideas from his new book, click on http://bit.ly/ytSKI3
Have you registered yet for “The Go-Giver Retreat” to be held in Sunny South Florida? Find out who the world-class presenters will be, and what they’ll be sharing with us.