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Like much of Winning Without Intimidation, "Thoughtfulness"
(i.e. thoughtful . . . thought full) is not only just a nice
way to be, it will also come in handy as one of your most
effective positive persuasion tools. In this article, you'll
learn the two biggest practical benefits of this extremely
beneficial trait. -----------------------
Question: As you suggest in your seminars, I'm working harder
on mastering the trait of Thoughtfulness (not always as easy as
it looks). And, while I agree that it's always nice to be
thoughtful and I can see how it benefits the other person, I'm
not sure how it benefits me. How is thoughtfulness going to
help me to become a better persuader and, will it ever get
easier for me to do without thinking? -----------------------
The Gift of Thoughtfulness (Is a Gift to Yourself)
By Bob Burg
Thoughtfulness. Yes, a simple enough concept; yet not always
easy to practice. Once mastered, however, it is the greatest
gift you can give; and not just to friends and loved ones on
special occasions and holidays... but to everyone, ALWAYS. And,
as you establish yourself as thoughtful to others, they'll go
out of their way to please you back.
Thoughtfulness is a habit; internalized, it becomes a way of
life, a part of our being. But it does take practice. Where
do we start? Our daily life. Here are some good practice
exercises. Do this for 21 days, as that's how long it takes to
form a new habit (actually, we don't "form" new habits as much
as we "replace" old, ineffective ones).
Thoughtful people don't wait, they "create" opportunities to
make life brighter and more enjoyable for those around them.
But, how? Simple things. Holding the door open for anyone near
you, regardless of gender or appearance. Soon, it's automatic,
and even comes with a smile (and a smile back in return). When
a baby in a restaurant is making a bit more noise than is
comfortable, and you see the parent looking embarrassed, smile
and comment on how cute the baby is.
A thoughtful person is always quick to pay a compliment
(especially to those who don't often receive them), realizing
the value it sometimes has beyond the obvious!
As you begin to pour your coffee at the local 7-11 store, and
spot the next customer in line waiting for you to finish, pour
the coffee into their cup first. He or she will be amazed
(believe me) and delighted. They'll have learned something as
well, and possibly do the same for another person tomorrow.
A thoughtful person parks a bit further from the entrance to
the store or the post office, leaving closer spaces for those
not as nimble, not covered by handicap status, or REALLY in a
hurry. You might ask, "Why should I do that? Nobody will know
why I'm doing this."
Two reasons: Number one, it's the right thing to do, which
makes you feel better about yourself, which in turn enhances
self- esteem. Number two, as touched on earlier, by repeating
thoughtful acts, they become habitual. Then, when it really
counts, you'll already be doing them naturally. Not only will
you make the world a kinder place to live, but because of the
precedent you've set with people, they'll go out of their way
to make you happy as well. Amazing how it works. Again, try it
for the next 21 days. I guarantee you'll see a delightful
difference.
Bob Burg http:www.burg.com is author of Endless Referrals:
Network Your Everyday Contacts Into Sales, Winning Without
Intimidation and The Success Formula.
He has a full line of books, ebooks and CDs from which everyone
can grow and prosper. Check them out by going to
http:www.burg.com , then click on the
link to his online store.
Bob also publishes a free weekly ezine to which you can
subscribe going to http://www.burg.com/newsletter.html.
Burg Communications, Inc.
PO Box 7002
Jupiter, FL 33468-7002
(800) 726-3667
bob@burg.com
Copyright 1998 Burg Communications, Inc.
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