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A wise philosopher said, "A person who is nice to their friends
but not nice to the waiter or waitress . . . is not a nice
person." I believe there's truth to that saying. After all, the
real test of a person's character can be said to come from how
they treat those who are not in a position to do help them.
Yet, complimenting a person - or simply even just being polite
to - a person not usually complimented, shown respect,or sometimes even acknowledged by others, can also have a
tremendous impact on how far that person will go out of their
way to help you, should the need arise. In this article, we'll
learn that, while attaining something from someone is not the
reason to be nice to them, it is often the result. -----------------------
Question: "I've noticed there are certain people who, although
they are nice to their peers or those they work for or are
trying to impress, treat others, not necessarily badly, but
with a lack of regard. It seems as though being nice to
everyone can never hurt. And, sometimes can even help. Is there
any advice you have on this topic?" -----------------------
Compliment the Uncomplimented
By Bob Burg
What a nice way to live life when you consistently go out of
your way to compliment those people who serve others but are
not usually treated with a great deal of respect. From the
waitperson to the skycap, from the hotel doorman to, well, any
service person - aside from tipping or a quick thank you, do
you refer to them as sir or ma'am? Do you acknowledge them with
kindness? Do you genuinely think of them as important and
significant, and does it show?
Yes, it makes a definite difference to their self-esteem. It
also reflects how far they'll go out of their way to make sure
you are happy. And you never know when that will come in handy.
An excellent illustration of Winning Without Intimidation by
complimenting the uncomplimented showcases the abilities of the
great former quarterback and now highly successful
entrepreneur, Fran Tarkenton. As a quarterback, and a small one
at only 5'10", Fran was always the target of the huge, tough,
often merciless defensive linemen.
Linemen can be mean to quarterbacks. They're supposed to be.
That's their job. On top of that, they know they don't earn the
kind of money most quarterbacks earn and they certainly don't
enjoy the same adulation and glory. Those 320 pound guys can be
downright rough on the Fran Tarkentons of the world.
But Fran is a master at dealing with people. He is now, and
certainly was back then. According to his former teammate,
Ahmad Rashad, after a particularly rough hit, Fran would
acknowledge his attacker by saying something like, "Great day
for football, isn't it?" or "Man, that was quite a hit."
These guys weren't exactly used to quarterbacks actually
talking to them in more than four letter words - and they
certainly weren't used to being treated as human beings.
Before long, they weren't quite as aggressive, mean and nasty
with Fran. Sure, they'd still hit him, but they wouldn't rough
him up as they did other quarterbacks. He took the anger out
of them and probably added years to his Hall of Fame career.
Wow, that's when Winning Without intimidation really comes in
handy - when your life depends upon it!
Of course, most of us aren't professional quarterbacks, or
otherwise chased by wild-eyed, maniacal, and just plain nasty
320 pound men even for non-athletic reasons . . . I hope. So,
let's go back to how we treat those who are generally not
treated with a great deal of respect by other people. This also
applies to anyone who may not seem to be in a position to do
something for us.
Maybe they are the one in need. As mentioned earlier, do you
think of them as important and significant human beings? Do you
genuinely feel that way on the inside so that your feelings
radiate on the outside? Yes, it does makes a definite
difference to them, and does almost ensure they'll go out of
their way to make sure you are happy.
No, that's not the "reason" you treat them well ... just the
"result."
Bob Burg http:www.burg.com is author of Endless Referrals:
Network Your Everyday Contacts Into Sales, Winning Without
Intimidation and The Success Formula.
He has a full line of books, ebooks and CDs from which everyone
can grow and prosper. Check them out by going to
http:www.burg.com , then click on the
link to his online store.
Bob also publishes a free weekly ezine to which you can
subscribe going to http://www.burg.com/newsletter.html.
Burg Communications, Inc.
PO Box 7002
Jupiter, FL 33468-7002
(800) 726-3667
bob@burg.com
Copyright 1998 Burg Communications, Inc.
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