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“Bob Burg is the greatest teacher of networking in the world ”

~ John Milton Fogg, author, The Greatest Networker in the World

Archive for the ‘Success’ Category

Strenghtening Our Receptivity Muscles

Wednesday, April 16th, 2014

Receptivity MusclesIn John David Mann’s and my book, The Go-Giver, Law #5 is “The Law of Receptivity.” Both of us are continually told by others that, while applying this law often created breakthroughs, it was also the most difficult Law to grasp.

When thinking about it on even a surface level, it makes sense. The ability to receive is linked not only to one’s own self-worth but to the constant stream of “money is bad”-type of lack messages provided courtesy of general society and the media.

Once we recognize that as long as we have provided lots of value to others we have earned the right to receive, then it becomes easier to accept this earned abundance.

Or, does it?

After all, our conscious is to our subconscious what the tip of the iceberg is to that part which is under water. We may know something on a conscious level yet our actions are being run by unconsciously programmed beliefs.

In this case, the subconscious nearly always wins.

Unless we consciously work on improving in this regard.

And, while the ability to receive includes financial, it also includes other areas of life such as kindness, friendship, love, acts of service, and sometimes even just a simple compliment.

In other words, we need to actively strengthen our overall receptivity muscles.

Let’s discuss this further in future posts.

Meanwhile, how do you do this? Any examples (personal or from others) you’d like to share?

The Game of Life Begins Again Now

Tuesday, April 1st, 2014

The Game of Life Begins Again Now - Bob BurgAre you disappointed in yourself that you made a mistake you simply should not have made? We’ve all been there. We all (at least, I) continue to “be there” from time-to-time.

Will you be disappointed in yourself  in the future because you make a mistake that — based on past mistakes — you’ll know better than to make again? We all (at least, I) will.

And, it’s okay. We’re human beings and we make mistakes, even when we know better. This is not to say that we should be lazy in our thinking and not care. It’s even fine to be disappointed in ourselves when we do that which we know better than.

The good news: we can continue to keep growing, and taking aim to not make those same mistakes in the future.

The GREAT news: the Game of Life always begins again now!

The Talent Add-On So Often Missed

Tuesday, March 18th, 2014

“There are young singers who have amazing natural talent. But they haven’t learned the skills necessary to take it to the next level.”

This was shared at our recent MasterMind session by a special guest invited by our host and Morning Coach Founder, JB Glossinger.

Matt KramerThis man certainly knows from whence he speaks. As the lead singer of the immensely popular 90′s hard rock band, Saigon Kick, Matt Kramer was not only a great showman from stage, he was also a student of the art, especially as it pertained to voice.

He is also a second-generation performer, as well as second generation voice coach.

What he showed us regarding the voice, how it actually works, and how it can be utilized more effectively was nothing short of phenomenal.

However, it was his quote above which inspired this post.

While there are singers who fall into this trap, so do those in many fields and professions. One may have an abundance of talent in a specific area. However, because that talent brought them a certain level of success, they either are not aware of the need to learn more, or are simply not willing to. That will stop them at a point far less than their potential.

Marshall Goldsmith nailed this concept beautifully in his classic for business leaders, What Got You Here Won’t Get You There. Though referring to character traits rather than skills, his premise was that so often a person progresses to a certain position in their company due to natural talent. At times, even despite certain faults and flaws. They might even believe they got to their current position because of those faults and flaws when actually it was in spite of them. Their talent legitimately brought them to a certain level of success.

However, it won’t get them any further. For that to happen, they must be open to learning that which goes beyond talent.

Yes, it takes work, commitment, and many hours of deliberate practice. But, it begins with understanding that the talent itself will take you only so far. Learned skills must be added.

Only then, will they advance to new levels of success.

Why We Sabotage Our Happiness

Thursday, March 13th, 2014

Why We Sabotage Our HappinessOver a couple of recent posts we looked at happiness based on the premise that — whether consciously or not — it is a person’s main motivation. However, it can only be attained by acting in accordance with one’s values.

We then defined happiness as being the mental feeling of well-being. We also saw that happiness is different for different people, as what brings happiness to one does not necessarily hold that same (or any) value for another.

The final question then, was:

3. If one’s main motivation is happiness, then why do so many otherwise-intelligent people seem to make decisions that are obviously contrary to their happiness?

This one’s the biggie. If human beings were logic-based creatures, it would not even be an issue. We’d base everything we do on what would bring us happiness; that mental feeling of well-being. But we know many people who don’t. And, maybe we don’t; at least not always.

Again, why?

I believe that while the definition of happiness we’ve been using is correct, it’s also not quite complete. As human beings, everything we do ultimately coincides with our beliefs; our subjective “truths” about life. I devoted an entire chapter to this in Adversaries into Allies where we discuss Belief Systems.

That unconscious operating system that drives our thoughts and decisions tells us what we believe the truth about life is, and — along with that — what we believe we deserve. And, unless we are living in accordance with those beliefs, we won’t be comfortable and will not experience that sense of mental well-being.

The paradox is that, if you don’t truly believe you should be happy, then you “cannot be happy being happy.” You might only be happy (the sense of mental well-being) when you’re miserable.

This is sad. It’s so very sad. It is the cause of people going from one bad relationship to another, it’s the cause of people keeping themselves struggling financially, and it’s the cause of many more counter-productive acts.*

So, before anything else, we must truly believe that happiness is one of life’s truths, and we must truly believe we deserve to be happy. Only then, can we be happy being happy.

Of course, I’d love to know your thoughts.


*The best book I’ve ever read on this subject and how to overcome it is Psycho-Cybernetics by Dr. Maxwell Maltz.

Happiness: It’s Really A Personal Thing

Friday, February 28th, 2014

happinessIn a recent post, we explored happiness as being a person’s main motivation. And, that it can only be attained by acting in accordance with one’s values.

I then posed a few questions and received some excellent responses. I’d like to restate the questions here, and answer them per my own understanding.

1. How do we define happiness? One of my earlier mentors, Harry Browne, defined it as, “The mental feeling of well-being.” I agree, but take it just a bit further and say, “A genuine feeling of ongoing joy and peace of mind, the result of living in accordance with your values.”

The key in both definitions is an overall feeling rather than something temporary, though every decision we make in the moment is based on seeking happiness whether it be short or long-term. Which leads to the next question:

2. Is “a sense of” happiness different for different people? Absolutely! As Harry wrote in his wonderful book, The Secret of Selling Anything (which was as powerful a “life lesson” as it was a sales lesson), “Happiness is relative. People experience happiness in different ways. People place different values on different things. What brings happiness to one person is meaningless to another.”

This is why a big mistake leaders and salespeople make when desiring to influence others is to assume that what brings us happiness will necessarily bring them happiness. It is also why influence is always about them, not about us.

The final question was:

3. If one’s main motivation is happiness, then why do so many otherwise-intelligent people seem to make decisions that are obviously contrary to their  happiness?

While I’ve never been a big fan of cliff-hangers, let’s discuss this one in the next post. Any additional thoughts based on the above?