I often teach in my conflict management seminars, that there is no such thing as a “difficult” person – which always starts a lively debate. And after some open discussion, participants eventually get the point. But never have I been able to express it as well as this..

“… since they are living in their own paradigm and are most likely unconscious of such, it is up to you to set – or reset – the matrix.”

The truth is, we each have our own unconscious paradigm, which (dare I say it) sometimes means that it is “we” who are perceived as the difficult ones. Dare it be true? : ))

Thanks Bob for expanding our viewpoints and providing such sage advice. I appreciate you.

Great blog and article, thanks for the post on Facebook too. I LOVE what you said to the question on your blog, IT’S NOT ABOUT RIGHT OR WRONG. It’s amazing that the very belief system (ego and judgement really) that needs to measure “right” or “wrong” cause such limitations. As we change our conciousess, take responability for our thoughts, actions, and feelings, THE WHOLE WORLD COULD BE “wrong” and we have no need to recognize that conflict. We can remain in harmony, internal peace, and celebrate EVERYTHING AS IS! My friend calls it “Greatness AS IS.”

(A little side note, this conciousness of right and wrong is EXACTLY what happened in the story of Adam and Eve. When Adam participated in the “tree of KNOWLEDGE OF GOOD AND EVIL (right and wrong)” he immediately found himself seperated from God.)

I like the title of your post, ACTIONS PRECEDE FEELINGS. I also like how on Facebook you qualified that by saying also Feelings can precede actions, and that “both action and feelings begin with thought!”

The AMAZING RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN ACTION AND FEELING is that it feeds into it’s own cycle, it self perpetuates it’s own continued momentum. THOUGHT DETERMINES WHAT THAT MOMENTUM IS, but it’s ACTION AND FEELING that cause the wheel to turn.

Example, When i am frustrated or at discord with my wife, I’m learning that an ACTION of love, causes the FEELINGS of love. I also know that when I am FEELING LOVE already, the FEELING of love causes ACTION of love. THE 2 FEED EACH OTHER!

IT’S LIKE A BATTERY AND AN ENGINE. They feed each other. Once the engine starts, the electricy flows back to the battery keeping it charged, and then flows through the battery feeding electricity back to the vehicle. The battery gives life to the engine, the engine gives life back to the battery.

YOU’RE BLOG SAYS ACTION PRECEDES FEELINGS…While both action and feelings DO FEED EACH OTHER, like an energy feeds a battery, and the battery feeds the engine, in this analogy, ACTION is the battery. ONCE FEELINGS (the engine) is started, the flow between ACTION AND FEELINGS begins, and of course FEELINGS becomes the driving force. BUT – when the engine (feelings) is not running, ACTION (the battery) is what FIRES IT UP! Once feelings is “fired up” everything flows together. THAT’S WHY EMOTION (E-MOTION) is the results of MOTION (or “action” precedes feelings).

THANKS FOR ALL YOU DO MAN!

jr