A little before I was about to present at a recent event in Minneapolis I was hanging out with a few people who were manning (or, is that, “personing?”) the Resource Tables for the various speakers. One was a table displaying Roxanne Emmerich’s book, Thank G-d It’s Monday.* The book is about how to make the workplace both a lot more fun and a lot more profitable. I read it. It’s terrific.

So, a woman who was not an attendee but attending another event within the same convention center walked by and, seeing some books on the table, stopped by. Nice enough person. The she saw the book’s title.

“Thank G-d It’s Monday?” she asked, with a tone of extreme disbelief.

“Yes” answered the person working the table, with a kind, genuine smile.

The woman, with a slight, disbelieving shake of her head, simply turned and walked away. No “good bye”, didn’t say “thank you” and didn’t any longer even acknowledge those at the tables. She simply walked away as though the event going on in the adjoining room must be some kind of rah-rah cult festivity. {quick note: realize that is simply my interpretation; I can’t read another person’s mind.}

One of the people from another Resource Table, turning to the person handling Roxanne’s table said, “Wow, does she need that book. You should have just given it to her for free.”

I opined, “She’d probably never read it.”**

“But, aren’t those the ones” asked the young man at another table, “who need it the most?”

Great question. And I believe that’s true.

Isn’t it interesting though, that indeed – about 99 percent of the time – the people who need something the most will never try it, use it, read, it, etc.

Yet, the 1 percent who do often make changes in their lives so significant, profound and dramatic it’s nearly beyond description.

For the 99 percent, it typically comes down to belief systems. There are certain things so far outside one’s “model of the world and how it works” that they will simply not be open to that suggestion.

So, what do you think it is about that other one percent that makes the difference; that causes them/allows them to be open to ideas with which they are currently not familiar?  

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*Note: The title of the book has the vowel intact. I used a hyphen in the word, “G-d” in keeping with Jewish tradition of never spelling out the Name of G-d out of respect and deference.

**Note: Please don’t confuse my statement, “She’d probably never read it” with my saying that it’s not good to offer. Within the proper context, it certainly is. Had the visitor stayed around, asked questions, and shown any openess I would most likely have bought her Roxanne’s book and given her a copy of The G0-Giver, as well. She did not make herself open.

Recently, I posted on twitter and on my Facebook page a quote from spiritual teacher, author and philosopher, Vernon Howard (1918-1992). I receive his quotes daily from the New Life Foundation, which he founded in 1979. It said:

“To see oneself as either good or bad is to not yet know oneself,  for real self-knowing is above these opposite labels.”

 I received, in response, numerous comments and interpretations. Two of them were:

From Anja (quoting 13^th Century mystic/poet Rumi): “Out beyond ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing there is a field. I’ll meet you there. 

Judy wrote (quoting Irish author/therapist/speaker Owen Fitzpatrick):There is a fundamental truth that you are going to be with only one person your entire life. Like it or not, that person is going to be with you 24-7 in every single moment you exist. That person is going to determine how successful or effective you become. The relationship you create with that person is extremely important. That person is yourself.”

Both of those interpretations provided much to think about (which, as a reader of Vernon Howard, I believe is exactly what he wants). Rumi’s quote seems to tell us that it’s not even a matter of in-between, but outside of the “good/bad” dichotomy (either/or) altogether.

Fitzpatrick’s quote, while on one hand, discussing personal responsibility, also seems to say that while we need to be aware of our “good” and “bad” aspects, it’s certainly best not to define ourselves that way in the entirety.

And, I’m sure there’s much more to Howard’s quote. Your thoughts?

Okay, no question about it; I’m a fan of Libby Gill. I first met her when she called to interview me a year and a half ago soon after The Go-Giver was published. We had a great time during the interview and became fast friends.

The former Hollywood entertainment executive (most notably, the “branding brain” behind the Dr. Phil show) had given up the fame, the money, the glory and the stress (actually turning down a huge job in corporate communications working for CEO and entertainment legend, Barry Diller himself to pursue her dream of becoming a personal branding coach.

Successes aside, she was feeling stuck. And, as she has done through the many challenges throughout her life (detailed in a previous book– this is her third), she found a way to get unstuck and pursue her dream; a dream that since has become hugely successful and a lot of fun for her.

Fortunately, in her newest book, You Unstuck she shares with us a formula for working past and getting unstuck in whatever area of our life – health, wealth, relationships, career, etc – we may be struggling.

And, in typical Libby Gill fashion, she does through a combination of hard-hitting, how-to, step-by-step advice and relatable stories that provide the reader with hope and a plan. 

My opinion is that this is her best book yet and will be an immense bestseller. Yep…it’s that good. Purchase You Unstuck and…get to your next level of success.

*Disclaimer: Today is the day that Libby is doing an Internet-promotion where many of us in her network of friends and associates are emailing our lists and bonuses are being offered when purchasing her book on amazon.com. Not only are we actively participating, we didn’t need to be asked; we let her know that we wanted to participate and for her to let us know as soon as she had the date. We did this through our other lists.

However, please know that this blog post is not being published because of the promotion. I would have written it anyway because it’s a book I believe you’ll enjoy and benefit from. I’ve been tweeting and Facebooking about it for the past couple of weeks. However, this post is being published today because I realize this is the day that will best serve Libby’s promotional cause…and I’m pleased to do that.

Studying people; the how’s, what’s and why’s can be so fascinating at times.

Monday, upon settling in my room at the Philadelphia Marriott, I asked the cleaning woman if she’d like to make $5 for ironing my shirt. I truly despise ironing and would rather pay someone to do it who would rather have the $5 than than they would to not iron my shirt.

She was delightful and did a great job. When I handed her the $5 she tried to refuse it saying, “It’s on the house.” Why she said that, I don’t know, but of course there was no way that was going to happen. I had to explain, however, that she would be doing me a favor by taking the money. Only then would she would accept it.

Apparently, she simply appreciated the opportunity to be employed and make a living and wanted to add as much value to the experience of a guest as she could. At the same time, she should be compensated for her time and professional skills, but her attitude was certainly admirable.

Then, yesterday afternoon, flying to Philadelphia, I heard (as could practically everyone) the man sitting in back of me and to the right  complaining to his seat mate about having a window seat. “I hate window seats!” he said.

Okay, I can relate, but he was sitting in First Class, with plenty of room in the seat and – while First Class certainly doesn’t have the perks it used to, it’s still better than sitting in a cramped seat. And it’s better than taking the bus…or walking…in a hurricane or in the desert.

After the flight landed, he called his assistant and lambasted her for getting him a window seat and ordered her to make sure “it didn’t happen” to him again. Then, when I saw him in baggage claim, he was complaining about something else to the person who had met him.

The guy could suck all the energy out of a room faster than…well, faster than someone could suck all the energy out of a room (I’m afraid I’m not very good at coming up with clever analogies on the spot).

Two people; two attitudes and – as far as I could tell – two totally different altitudes. At least of inner peace. In that regard, the cleaning professional at the Marriott soars way above the other one.

Thought: Please don’t falsely conclude from this that “poor people are happy and wealthy people are not.” Both can be happy; both can be miserable. It does show – in my opinion – that gratitude for our lot and situation has a lot to do with how happy we are. And, of course, the guy in the plane just might very naturally be a person who looks at the negative side of everything.

Friday’s event in Houston was a lot of fun. Now, after being home for a couple of days, it’s back out this afternoon for three cities in three days; first, Philly for a corporate gig tomorrow, then to Minneapolis for the Get Connected Event with Lisa Nichols, Janet Attwood and Roxanne Emmerich. This one is open to the public so – if you’re anywhere near the Twin Cities – come on and join us. Then, on to Tempe, AZ for another corporate program.

I’ll still be in touch with many of you on Facebook and Twitter during my stops. Also my intent is to blog a couple of times. Let’s see how I do.

Speaking of “how am I doing” my desk is still neat. Yes, it really is. This is a good thing. Might also be surprising to anyone who knows me. It’s definitely been a “mental thing” with me; not a physical one. After all, I’ve read the excellent books, articles and such. The how-to aspect of organizing a desk is fairly straightforward. Yet……..

So, Dr. Mollie Marti – whom I mentioned in the previous post gave me a coaching session after I admitted on her show that I suffer from MDS (Messy Desk Syndrone) – asked me to focus on the following three things every time I made the effort to move something (anything!) off my desk and put it in its proper place:

1. Thoughts: What am I thinking about as I think about as I begin the process? I’m thinking how It’s something I need to do in order to obtain the benefits of having a clean and orderly desk.
2. Emotions: What am I feeling about it? I’m feeling a sense of satisfaction in knowing I’m improving on a defective character trait, and also feeling how great it will…well, feel to have “desk clearity” (yes, “clear-ity”)
3. Actions: Then, take the necessary action because that’s what makes it all work.

Of course, Dr. Mollie reminded me that during our 30 day “desk cleanse” my time out of town does not count. But, that’s okay. I’m starting to feel a bit of the ol’ confidence. I see myself having a clear, neat and orderly desk. That’s not just an affirmation, it’s a commitment to myself and to my productivity.

How are you in this regard? Am I the only with (or rather, who used to have) Messy Desk Syndrome?