Comments on: Be First, Be Fast, Be…Friendly? Part Two http://www.burg.com/2009/08/be-first-be-fast-be%e2%80%a6friendly-part-two/ Bob Burg's Official Website Tue, 07 Feb 2012 18:43:10 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Good Thoughts, Bad Thoughts, Spilled Coffee And Re-Frames | Bob Burg http://www.burg.com/2009/08/be-first-be-fast-be%e2%80%a6friendly-part-two/comment-page-1/#comment-5502 Good Thoughts, Bad Thoughts, Spilled Coffee And Re-Frames | Bob Burg Mon, 25 Oct 2010 14:42:14 +0000 http://www.burg.com/?p=1098#comment-5502 [...] Time for a “Re-frame.” [...] [...] Time for a “Re-frame.” [...]

]]> By: Does Positive Expectation Really Work? | Bob Burg http://www.burg.com/2009/08/be-first-be-fast-be%e2%80%a6friendly-part-two/comment-page-1/#comment-3402 Does Positive Expectation Really Work? | Bob Burg Sun, 06 Jun 2010 17:07:46 +0000 http://www.burg.com/?p=1098#comment-3402 [...] be met by a person who would be very difficult to deal with? Sure, because you are setting the Matrix (the premise from which everything else will originate) of a [...] [...] be met by a person who would be very difficult to deal with? Sure, because you are setting the Matrix (the premise from which everything else will originate) of a [...]

]]> By: Jennifer Wideman http://www.burg.com/2009/08/be-first-be-fast-be%e2%80%a6friendly-part-two/comment-page-1/#comment-1310 Jennifer Wideman Thu, 13 Aug 2009 01:13:22 +0000 http://www.burg.com/?p=1098#comment-1310 Love it Bob! Love it Bob!

]]> By: Bob Burg http://www.burg.com/2009/08/be-first-be-fast-be%e2%80%a6friendly-part-two/comment-page-1/#comment-1307 Bob Burg Tue, 11 Aug 2009 21:38:07 +0000 http://www.burg.com/?p=1098#comment-1307 Hi Kirsty, you are wise indeed. Great points. Loved what you said about the Matrix. And, yes, Carnegie's "How to Win Friends..." is the classic of positive persuasion. Absolutely brilliant. I've read it many times and continue to learn and re-learn each time. There are also times I'll just pick it up and read a story or two. Always seems to be exactly what I needed to read. Keep up the great work, my friend!! Hi Kirsty, you are wise indeed. Great points. Loved what you said about the Matrix. And, yes, Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends…” is the classic of positive persuasion. Absolutely brilliant. I’ve read it many times and continue to learn and re-learn each time. There are also times I’ll just pick it up and read a story or two. Always seems to be exactly what I needed to read. Keep up the great work, my friend!!

]]> By: Kirsty Hogg http://www.burg.com/2009/08/be-first-be-fast-be%e2%80%a6friendly-part-two/comment-page-1/#comment-1304 Kirsty Hogg Tue, 11 Aug 2009 20:51:38 +0000 http://www.burg.com/?p=1098#comment-1304 Hi Bob, Thanks for starting this incredible conversation. I love the term “set the Matrix”. It reminds me of the movie, "The Matrix" where Neo has to learn for himself that he can program his own reality with no limitations, and “there is no spoon”, etc. Anyway! I am just about to read Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People” all the way through for the second time, and have started intentionally applying some his tips and recommendations, many of which parallel yours. I have really enjoyed (sometimes awestruck) at the results each time I do this. I’m just learning all this for the first time and it seems like a large part of if is dropping the ego (emotions) and letting the other person “win” (which is in fact an illusion as you are still driving the bus). By doing that, you avoid the inevitable outcome of no one winning. Even if you are right or “win”, no one will win as they will feel deflated and not want to help you or listen to you. Because it is better to listen and make the other person feel important and give them the win, that way, they will feel safe with you and then help you. In life, this is where they give you the best route out of the parking lot. In business, this is when they bring out their check book. Hi Bob, Thanks for starting this incredible conversation. I love the term “set the Matrix”. It reminds me of the movie, “The Matrix” where Neo has to learn for himself that he can program his own reality with no limitations, and “there is no spoon”, etc.

Anyway! I am just about to read Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People” all the way through for the second time, and have started intentionally applying some his tips and recommendations, many of which parallel yours. I have really enjoyed (sometimes awestruck) at the results each time I do this. I’m just learning all this for the first time and it seems like a large part of if is dropping the ego (emotions) and letting the other person “win” (which is in fact an illusion as you are still driving the bus). By doing that, you avoid the inevitable outcome of no one winning. Even if you are right or “win”, no one will win as they will feel deflated and not want to help you or listen to you. Because it is better to listen and make the other person feel important and give them the win, that way, they will feel safe with you and then help you. In life, this is where they give you the best route out of the parking lot. In business, this is when they bring out their check book.

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